This past week I have been talking a lot about relationships. I was asked to lead devotional time at my church and I also hosted intimate Galetines day retreat at my home last night.
So naturally I am thinking a lot about relationships today after that and it being Valentine's Day its at the forefront of my mind.
During these events, I talked about the structure of my relationships, I tend to structure my relationships like this
1. God
-He is so good he built us for relationship first with Him, and then with others.
2. My husband.
-Gen 2:24 says "a man leaves his father and mother and cleaves to His wife"
3. My kids
That is already A LOT of work. relationships are work. These three areas, if they are hurting we need to make sure to work on these first. Especially our relationship with God. It's always amazing to me how when I am pouring into my relationship with God the more the other areas in my life just tend mend themselves. God is in the heart changing business. He is working things out in our hearts daily. Each day mending the brokenness we each have. Whether we realize it our not, each of us have a part of us that wants to earn our salvation. What is so amazing about Christianity. It is the only religion that solves that problem. We are not "good enough" and we can not earn our way, but while we are sinners He died for us. If you have that relationship you are covered by His sacrifice, letting going of the striving to earn is also a gift I cannot quite put into words. Why is is so hard for us to let go? But when we do, it's so freeing.
4. The next relationships are the ones with my extended family (parents/siblings/in laws etc) and my dear friends.
What a gift that He gives us!! Friendship.
In John 4 (the woman at the well/the Samaritan woman), Jesus talks about a woman who has been in a place of shame in her culture for her adult life. She had many husbands and she didn't have many friends we can tell from the clues in the texts.
In this time frame, you didn't walk to a well by yourself and you definitely didn't do it in the middle of the day. It was done early in the morning and/or evening. And you went with your friends. People did life together, they worked on their relationships while doing their daily tasks. I feel like this is something we have lost in our culture. I do my laundry, cooking, baking, working mostly on my own. Not with others.
In Hebrew there is a word called "HAVAR" it is a word for friendship or companionship. This woman did not have a HAVAR friend.
But then, Jesus. He is always there in the details. Making much out of very little. He is there at that well. He meets her right where she is in her life, he mets her in her shame and pain. He is lifting her up out of her shame and restoring her to a place of honor.
Her community did not see her as worthy of friendship. But He did. He talks theology with her. Men did not talk theology with women, especially across the cultural lines of Jewish and Samaritans (they did not like each other), and He allowed her to be the mouthpiece to tell her community about Him. He is lifting her up.
It does not say this in the Bible, but I have to imagine that this woman had HAVAR friends after this encounter.
I don't know where you are in your relationships. I don't know what type of valentines day you are having or will have... but I do know you are known, seen, and loved but this man! Jesus. That there is a gift.
If He is doing this for her, He is doing it for you.
He is bigger and better than we can even imagine and He is the relationship and heart changing business.